Product Promoter Pillows

"Well done, another winner, Haskins."

Oli was a walking advertisement for thickening & revitalizing shampoos & conditioners.

Convention for People Who Like to Attend Conventions.

'Maybe change is a good thing.'

'Ere-we distinctly asked for SAM an' Ella!'

"With your voice and my marketing skills, we'll sell records by the million!"

Garage Music

Advertising space on jockeys' bottoms

'Ask me about my portfolio.'

'Some of you may have heard that Dr. Weil is giving HIS talk right now in the next auditorium.'

Make love not war

"Sure I'd love to buy thirty thousand subscriptions."

An honesty of agents

'Oh I retired a few months back...I'm a promoter now.'

'Usherettes and razzamatazz won't bring back the crowds - we need some new lions'.

"Narrative play is dead."

"So much for that publicity stunt."

Archers.

"You gotta admit, they rock PRETTY hard for a group with no arms."

'He's got laryngitis. I'll have to speak for him.'

What about the company car you promised?

Cats-can-sell anything advertising agency.

"And now, our newest hit song..."

'When he said he was going to promote staff health and fitness and encourage a little weight loss I thought he'd be giving us gym passes.'

"Have you considered an ounce of prevention?"

"I hear good things about you from your publicist."

Manager: 'EXCELLENT promoting Jan! It's another RECORD crowd!'

If Bernie Ecclestone does not get his pound of flesh from Montreal, the Canadian Grand Prix will not roll.

'Looks like the milk depot are doing a promotion on fireworks again.'

'Bark less, work more.'