Product Comparison Pillows

"So, the Scharfs have an atoll. Big deal."

"You can't compare apples and oranges because oranges have longer legs."

'Oh, nothing's wrong -- I just expected Earthlings to be taller, that's all.'

'If by 'great', you mean 'terrible', then yes, we have plenty of great beers for under $4.00 a six-pack.'

"Ten Dollars?! I can't eat that." Bob was on a strict low-cost diet.

'He's gonna dunk on me. I just know it.'

Beef stew 50c. (In a bowl - $1.75)

"His father came from a family of climbers."

'You called me out of the blue... Cobalt, ultramarine, prussian, cerulean or phthalocyanine?'

"2 for 1 special: Clean, polish, buff, seal"

"As far as form following function, it's a brilliant design for a business center."

'What's the situation about new wands these days?' - 'You can't beat 'compare wands.com.'

'You don't look like your passport photo.'

Customer: 'Do you have anything for the same price that doesn't cost so much?'

'She's going to six different psychiatrists for her compulsive comparison shopping problem.'

Apples and oranges

Shampoo - New Flick In The Eye Cap

Nothing worked. And when he tried to complain they just brushed him off.

Memoirs

"Remember that robin I brought along last time and explained the comparison to your bill?"

'Why are you using a tooth paste that relieves itching and burning while it shrinks swollen membranes?'

Ultimate generics.

"Perfect! but it's cheaper online."

'How do you like those?' - 'Great, I can see the same pair across the road for £5 less.'

"Competition is in aisle four. . . but we've only got generics."

"I've wasted valuable hours of my life comparing the comparison sites and comparing each site for comparison. . . and I've forgotten what I was comparing in the first place!!!"

'Our prices are drastically marked down from their drastic markup!'

"Your life must be very exciting."

"Such bargains on this side!"