Procedure Jester T-Shirts

"Damn! - I forget . . . I'm supposed to give two weeks' notice . . . !"

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

"And as soon as he's on the mend,we'll get the physiotherapist in here with a ball of twine."

"We're following Carrot Top."

'Kimble, I'm going to give you a chance at purchasing - nip over to the cafe and get me a cheese and pickle sandwich.'

Stepping on clown's shoe...

"Just how long has there been a maraschino cherry at the top of the organizational chart?"

Is there a spin doctor in the house?

'Make him laugh, make him cry.'

'Cut down on sodium? I'm taking that with a pinch of salt.'

"We can give you enough medication to alleviate the pain, but not enough to make it fun."

'I want a win-win situation where both wins are ours.'

'Keep it under you hat, but I want you to enrich some uranium.'

"I'm popping out for a tinkle."

"When you hear me begin talking about our lousy sales figures, you guys create a distraction."

Ski kicker.

"Jane is sales, Fred is accounting, and Johnny's song and dance."

When Managers have a Four Seasons pizza.

'Any questions?'

'When you are done balancing in your chair we will continue the meeting.'

"I don't like these sales figures. Prepare them in another color and font and resubmit them."

'All those in favour of my new proposal say aye. Those against, also say aye.'

"OK, you're going to feel a little prick, followed by a burning desire to sue me."

'Sorry, but we can't serve you the grande size anymore without a prescription.'

'I'm looking for someone who can make me laugh.'

Travelling jesters. No fools left aboard overnight.

'Make sport of the Queen.'

'Ringing in your ears, you say?'

"We're bears you fool, we don't need agendas!"

Show Jumping Tantrums

'I told the jester he could take April Fool's Day off.'

"We have a clear work/life policy. . . If you have a life, you get more work."

'There's been unexpected complications involving your husband's bill.'

"Med Brittle"

Never poke fun.