Prison Story Fan Pillows

"I'd like a quick word with you after visiting time."

' It's a bit of an anti climax - I've washed it but I can't go any where ! '

Tic-tac-toe

"My problem is a recessive gene for honesty and a dominant gene for robbery."

Visitation Day at the Bug Jar

'She's promised to wait for me but I only hope her memory isn't what it was!'

'One of the guards is leaiving, would you like to make a contribution to his farewell gift?'

'Before you go to prison, Sims, I'd like to give you this award as 'Scapegoat of the Year'.'

Prisoner decorating his cell.

The Quack Quack Diaries: Quack Quack In the Big House

"No ham in this, I hope?"

'I guess it all started the day my mom said, son, if you put your mind to it, there's nothing you can't do.'

'It's windy this morning.'

'Unfortunately The Hounds of The Baskerville were my role models.'

Preferred Prisons

"Escape Thursday? But that's Bar-B-Qued pork night!"

A prison with a conservatory attached.

"Surely it can't be twenty-five years already!"

'I'm getting into a rut -- campaign, election, indictment, parole... campaign, election, indictment, parole....'

"This is Cliff. He's a neo-con."

Guys in torture chamber: 'TGIF!' and 'Shaddup.'

"I had everyone fooled. Could have got away with it, too, if he had just kept his big mouth shut."

'Well, I'd best be off, Arthur, the clink of glasses behind bars and all that...'

Prison ain't so bad- ? -aside from all the metrosexual activity.

"I got eight to twelve years, which was in line with Wall Street expectations."

"Refusal to Obey a Police Officer. You?"

'I got busted for Identity Theft: I was pretending to be the Prince...'

'Yeah? Well you could use some deodorant, too!'

"He says he won't wear a mask."

'I'm a celebrity now...so get me out of here!'

'When I first saw you on TV, I just knew you were innocent of stalking.'

'Look on the bright side, think of all the money you saved by conducting your own defence.'

'Don't worry, I didn't tell them anything they didn't already suspect.'

Prison decorating

Identity theft. You?