Prison Culture Pillows

A white collar criminal's first day. I'm new here. How much do we tip the guards?

Prison Guard Tattoo

He said the colour orange would suit me .

"Where do you see yourself in 20 to 25 years?"

Tic-tac-toe

"The lettuce I paid with was fresher than the lettuce I bought."

Madoff and devil.

'Let's get a kitty.'

Prisoner Crossing

'My wife says not to worry. She's convinced she can get me out of here with coupons.'

Police Lineup Escape

"I stole me a pot of gold. That's how I became a Lepre-CON."

Exhibition for Prisoners

''Willie the Wizard' gets out next week -- get ready to change all the locks.'

'One of the guards is leaiving, would you like to make a contribution to his farewell gift?'

Sweet Jailbreak

'Ms. Andrews, have there been any important office memos, voice-mails, texts, tweets or IMs during my incarceration?'

'My biggest mistake was to make a 'death-bed confession'... then I made a full recovery!'

'The food's not too bad here. It tastes just like yours and just like yours, it also comes out of a can.'

Ronnie 'the chameleon' waits for a break in the traffic, before making his break for it...

"One night in a moment of rage. . . I removed a 'Do Not Remove Under Penalty of Law' tag from a pillow!"

Man to lady: 'Prisons are overcrowded, so we're seeing more sentences of timeout instead.'

Prison Wallpaper.

'OVERCROWDED-I'll say it's OVERCROWDED!'

'I mistakenly thought that 'mutual' meant the funds were equally mine to use.'

'See, I told you it was a good idea to talk to the plants.'

'Try to think of it as early parole.'

Yeah, yeah, yeah, framed by the cat - that's what we all say.

"My name's Aldred and I'll be your server this evening."

'You're the one who called for a locksmith?'

"It's a sort of Birdman of Alcatraz situation, except that Martin here isn't a bird."

Convict Decor

"The reason I never get any visitors is because all my family and friends are in here!"

'Sweetheart, your calls are slowing my early release.'

"We're so close that we're finishing each other's sentences."