Prideful Ponderer T-Shirts

"I don't know what happened. I usually carry enough money around to make myself feel superior."

Soothsayer. My fatal flaw is hubris? Sure it has to be something better than that!

Crowded Ice Fishing

'Gimme a Canadian club on the rocks!'

'I made a hundred on the Spanish test. Gracias.'

"Sitting here with you each day at sunset reminds me I have to get a job."

"Look, if I had all the answers, would I be living alone on the top of a mountain?"

An American flag being hung by Trump's tie

Scars and Bars

'When you invented vegetables, Sir, did you know that my mother would be able to fit them all into one garden?'

The Vatican's undercover mission to Antarctica, and some endangered penguins.

'Sometimes, in the stillness and warmth of an afternoon sun, I can almost hear interest compounding.'

Frog Baby Names

Lost and Profound.

"Have you tried turning off your conscious mind and then turning it back on again?"

'Yes sir, Thoreau had the right idea.'

"You what? Well, you darn well ought to have a guilt complex"

Trump Bird

Fish sleeps while counting worms that jump over a fence.

'Mummy, what's a daddy one of those called?'

"That would've gone better if I'd gotten here with my gift list instead of my spelling list."

"And please let Alan Greenspan accept the things he cannot change, give him the courage to change the things he can and the wisdom to know the difference."

'I warned him that this was no place for a guy with inner-ear problems.'

'How come there aren't any peace heroes?'

'Well, in my case, Muzak DOESN'T help with meditation!'

'Do you ever wonder about this whole 'money' thing?'

'...if you look at it in the right way it begins to make sense.'

Barack Obama Loves America

'Hurry up and enjoy your life as a pensioner! Three.. Two.. One..'

'His version of sin is different from the press account.'

Fingers

'I should know who he is! His work is in every gallery I go into.'

"Oh, swallow your pride and go to the eye doctor!"

The thinker.

'In accordance with the Patriot Act, we find the accused guilty of unspecified acts.'