Press Reporter Prints

The Croucho Club

Independent Exit Poll.

"And just like that, e got rid of Florida."

Squeezing the Free Press.

It soon became apparent that the vicar was an undercover journalist.

"I caution everyone to avoid taking the first field reporter job that comes along."

"Hey, I'm thirsty. I need a drink. A drink and a liverwurst sandwich. Hey, how about a sandwich and a beer down at Gallagher's, then we can go shoot some pool? Or maybe take in a movie. Hey, I'm talking to you."

News: Deaths! Deaths! Deaths!

'Let's go to our education reporter for more underreporting of school success stories.'

"Well, how do things look from where you sit?"

"And now here's Cathie with the hypothetical portion of the news."

"The economy always seems to be recovering, but it never recovers."

Press Freedom

Gay Times...

Difference of Opinion

"Brilliant report, I can't tell where the facts and the fiction begins"

A little bird told me...

There's a crew here from 60 minutes and they're coming this way.

"Now we move over to the sports desk."

Man Reading Laptop.

"Analysts warn that computerization of the villages won't give the expected results!"

"This just in: one of us always tells lies; the other always tells the truth. Who's who? Stay tuned."

"You're either lying or not telling the truth."

"I'm going to miss it when they stop warning us"

'He was a great writer'

Turkey, present day...

'Hey!! What gives, there's nothing but a bunch of squiggly lines on this newspaper.'

"Hang in there everyone—we promise a cute animal story at the end."

Newspaper suicide.

'Stocks rose on the rumor that the market is mostly rumor-driven.'

"Allow me to respond to your question with a question of my own that I can answer."

"Wow. . . is that you, Mr Erdogan. . . Mr Kim Jong-un. . . Mr Putin. . . Mr Maduro. . . Mr. Bin-Salman. . . Mr al-Assad. . ."

2020 Swiss barmy knife

"What's with the Tim Russert act?"

Hello, this is Cable News. Oh. I'm Mortimer Park. As you know, we only have four short years until the next presidential election. So it's time to start asking: Who should run? Whom do you prefer? (A) Al Gore … (B) John Kerry … (C) Marco Rubio … (D) Ted Cruz ... (E) Christ Christie ... House of Java Cybercafe. How about (F) You? Mr. Eugene Yu is actually (T).