Prescription Decipherers Pillows

"Young man, Your handwriting is attrocious!"

(Scheduled) Sex, (Prescription) Drugs & (Classic) Rock & Roll

"I believe it was called 'cursive'."

"Are you sure there wasn't a floor model?"

"I've thought about what you said, about how plate tectonics will kill us all!"

'...Contains Phixe-knide, TBHQ, hydro-cla, Cyklid, Yetfopnmide - and other unpronounceable stuff.' (grocery store)

'Okay. Now. Insert Part K into slot G...'

"Let me guess: Step two, add sand."

'Can I trust a Doctor whose prescriptions have absolutely no side effects?'

"You'll be working entirely on commission. We were kidding about the salary."

'...we were able to hide some rather significant losses.'

"I'm not sure she really liked our gift. She used just two exclamation points after 'Thanks'."

Maze of legalities.

Auditioning for Finnegans Wake.

Man has drug cabinet labelled 'Safe Drugs' and 'Not Sure Drugs'.

'Wait! Tell me again about the 'excessive gas and oily discharge'?'

'Taking anti-depressants is getting me down...'

Europe and TTIP

'This prescription looks as though the doctor wrote it in Greek.'

"We raised the price but lowered the down payment... so it kind of evens out."

'These pamphlets will explain the procedure and these leaflets will explain the pamphlets.'

"Of course it's hard to understand. They wouldn't be billing 'codes' , if they were easy to decipher."

'H-m-m-mm...may cause insomnia, joint pain, nausea, dizziness, lethargy,gas, irritability, muscle ache, bloating and may nullify the initial good feeling'

Descartes School of Philosophy.

Pharmacy: 'It's a miracle drug because it hasn't been taken off the market yet.'

'Take two of these after I leave the room.'

"What you need is a prescription. I'm giving you some...."

Pharmacist, prescriptions - "It's a forgery, I can read it."

'Connect insert A, B, and C into slots D, E, and F. Tighten using assembly tool G. What in the H are they talking about?'

Dept of statistics: 'vital...nonessential'.

The good news is they'll probably name it after me!

'I got all woozy reading the restrictions in my health insurance contract!'