Prenatal Specialist T-Shirts

GPs to be required to offer appointments in advance.

"Great! I must be growing. The womb was less than half full last week."

Pregnant lady being greeted by foetus.

"There's your son's heartbeat, and over here is the app he's developing."

No kicking: 12-6 Mon-Sun

"I'd better enjoy this while I can. It's the only home I'll own without a mortgage!"

"Sorry Tina, I won't be able to come over: Joey is finally asleep and I don't dare move..."

"I guess for me family planning is just a study in fertility."

'It's a boy. He's healthy and coming along fine, but he may be a little crnkt at birth owing to his claustrophobia. He will have feminine tendencies but is not actually gay. In fact, he'll eventually develop a taste for hard liquor and trashy women...'

"Mum's biological clock is ticking away...OOPS!...my mistake. That's indigestion."

Radiology, Cardiology and Fertility Clinic.

"I didn't realise it could be so complicated!"

"Have you considered trying for a puppy?"

"All this stuff? I'm meeting for two now."

"You need to stop pressing the snooze button on your biological clock."

"Leapfrog is the latest craze among the kids, but experts say it contribute to declining birthrates. Find out why � after the break!"

Baby on Board

Man leaves sperm bank. Woman says: 'Thanks, do come again.'

IVF assessment centre.

"It's perfect for starting a family."

Fertility clinic open day - Man holding balloons shaped like sperm.

Pregnancy Test

Three Parent Baby

"No, dear, the baby didn't take a selfie. It's an ultrasound."

"Sir, the platoon suffered heavy casualties from a roadside IUD."

Fertility Center.

'How far along are you?'

'I warned you that the fertility drugs might have side effects.'

'What a coincidence....that's my mum's name to!'

'And once we transfer the embryo, aspirate the follicles, and align your ovulation with the doctor's gold schedule, voila -- natures little miracle.'

'And for Pete's sake, let's cut out out all this artificial insemination.'

Fertility Clinic - "Who wants to be mother?"

"We can make you more pregnant than you ever though possible."

"Please note nurse: healthy baby, next appointment in two weeks..."

'Well, it all started with a group hug.'