Poultry Pals Pillows

"OK, now another guy found a feather in his soup! One of you is molting, and I need to know who!"

Cockerel and hen

'Goodness, no Doctor, my husband is not calling you any insulting names. He's a duck and that's the only word he knows.'

"What I'd give for a stimulating conversation..."

'Oh, it's a long, long time...From here to November...'

'Henrietta is so self-confident.'

"At $4 a dozen, it's hard to balance a career and a family."

'Isn't he supposed to sit on your shoulder Captain?'

"Stick with me baby, and you'll eat slop every day."

Why would birdie need newspaper?

"What if we're just a ship in somebody's bottle? Yar, here comes me existential crisis."

A mime and his pet parrot talk to one another.

Don't be surprised --- They always start out as quadrupeds.

'Why did the chicken cross the road?'

Golfer mistakes a hen's egg for his golf ball.

'He followed me home. Can I keep him?'

"Don't be so dramatic. You tell me you're pregnant every day?"

"I'm going to prepare a special dish for Thanksgiving dinner."

Lady taking her Cochin chickens for a walk.

"The last one is Uncle Charlie. He was pardoned in 1987."

Man with broken leg in cast.

"How many letters can you read?"

They say animals have the sixth sense and the talent to look into the future...

"I love you a bushel and a peck. How else?"

'Tasty bird.'

"My once perky chicken breasts hang like flapjacks, I don't lay eggs anymore, I'm burning up with hot flashes, I'm...."

A classic example of Poultry in Motion.

"I've had 720 children. I hope they're all doing well."

'Se Non E Vero' Etc.

"I just don't get it! Why don't humans protect us? Don't they know they would be doomed without us?"

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken replies: 'I'm free-range pal, I can go where I like.'

'How do you prepare your chicken?' 'We just tell 'em they're gonna die.'

'Hey, look at this beauty... Man, I love those crunchy, well tanned sweethearts!'

"Hundreds of eggs a year, and I've never seen a vet. The Mare has one foal, and it's the Mayo Clinic."

'He's barking mad!'