Poultry Motivational Speaker Pillows

"I believe in eggs, and I think that you all believe in eggs, too!"

The Rooster Comedian.

'Don't fall for all that...you should see him first thing in the morning.'

Chicken Little Inc. Pecking Order.

"I can assure you ladies all our eggs come from free range chickens."

Woman keeping a chicken in her room for fresh eggs

"Shouldn't there be some sort of pecking order around here?"

'Hello, Ebeneezer! It's me - the ghost of coming dinner!'

'I don't think we should have any more eggs Chester. Maybe you should see the vet about having your chicken nuggets removed.'

On Sale Today Free Range Chickens...Back In One Hour.

'Let's forget the duck de la margola and order something else!' (man seeing duck fleeing from cook).

'With proper flossing there's no reason for hens to not have teeth.'

Hen Night

'You think irritable fowl syndrome is bad? Just wait until you hit menopause.'

Suddenly, the line went dead.

"Half a dozen brown—three large, three jumbo!"

"I have a sweet pad and thirteen girlfriends. Can't beat a chicken's life."

"Dayum. She bootylicious."

Maternity ward on the farm.

"Nothing to worry about. A nuggetectomy is a very simple procedure."

"I'm being promoted in the company's pecking order."

'It might be a satanic cult: Not only did they chop his head off, they're stuffing his body with bread now...'

'Mom said I'd be a late bloomer, but this is ridiculous.'

'Don't worry about retirement Irma: There's more to life than just laying eggs...'

"I'm very proud of the grade A's, son, but what about these grade B smalls?"

"Don't be alarmed, Lois, but there appears to be a pop-up thermometer protruding from your right buttock."

'I have to face it Irma, I haven't laid an egg in a week now: I'm menopausal...'

'You may want to consider diversifying your portfolio.'

Crowing Rehearsals

'That's weird, do you smell barbecue sauce, Sarah'

"I don't know what it is, we just look fabulous in Cranberry."