Poultry Jokester Pillows

Chicken Séance,

Dr B orge tests his new cow-fart ozone depletion meter.

'I don't think we should have any more eggs Chester. Maybe you should see the vet about having your chicken nuggets removed.'

On Sale Today Free Range Chickens...Back In One Hour.

"Well, there goes your theory of him thinking of you as his pack leader."

Phoning a Busy Sheep: 'Sorry I can't get to the phone right now, please make an animal noise after the bleat!'

Hen Night

Cleaning the Horse

"I'm a free woman. Edgar tried to cross the road."

COWS: Spare cow

"Nothing to worry about. A nuggetectomy is a very simple procedure."

"I have a sweet pad and thirteen girlfriends. Can't beat a chicken's life."

Riding instructor waits to fish a child out of jumping obstacle.

'Is it my imagination, or has this suddenly become harder to push?'

'It might be a satanic cult: Not only did they chop his head off, they're stuffing his body with bread now...'

Virtual chicken crossing the road.

"I cross therefore I am."

'I have to face it Irma, I haven't laid an egg in a week now: I'm menopausal...'

"Come on, Vinny! We already know you crossed the road. What we want to know is, why?"

'What's this?' - 'Your sealed orders, not to be opened till 7 furlongs.'

'When I'm in the saddle I'm part of the horse.' - 'Yes, but which part?'

'Hi, my name's Bernard and I'm an alcoholic...'

"I don't know what it is, we just look fabulous in Cranberry."

"And don't get me started about being henpecked. Why do you think I crossed the road in the first place?!"

Turkey with an ax to grind.

'Yeah, hi, Bob...when you asked me to pop in and feet Spot, I was kind of under the impression he was a dog!'

Kid to dad about pet door on fishbowl: 'It's a dogfish.'

'He's a great dog...a bit of a drooler though.'

'Ok Phil, you can stop the trash talk now!'

101 uses of a dead cat: chaps.

'It was just a matter of time, old cowpuncher, 'til one of them punched back.'

Rider Helping Horse Over the Jump

"So, why are you crossing the road?"