Poultry Appreciation Pillows

A chicken looks at a computer screen that reads "Y2K is coming! Y2K is coming!!".

The Rooster Comedian.

'Oh, it's a long, long time...From here to November...'

"At $4 a dozen, it's hard to balance a career and a family."

'Henrietta is so self-confident.'

Chicken Little was correct about something falling, unfortunately, it was an axe, and not the sky.

"OK, now another guy found a feather in his soup! One of you is molting, and I need to know who!"

"Has anyone turned in a chicken?"

Golfer mistakes a hen's egg for his golf ball.

'Take my advice kid. Enjoy yourself now, because once you get married, your free ranging days are over.'

"Don't be so dramatic. You tell me you're pregnant every day?"

"You look ridiculous Ed. Why can't you just accept you're going bald and ditch the wig?"

Lady taking her Cochin chickens for a walk.

"The last one is Uncle Charlie. He was pardoned in 1987."

"It's a destination wedding invitation. We have to cross the road."

"I can't believe this! Is there anyone here who isn't too chicken to jump?"

'Tasty bird.'

'I admire your can-cock-a-doodle-do attitude.'

"I love you a bushel and a peck. How else?"

'Hello, Ebeneezer! It's me - the ghost of coming dinner!'

'I'm sorry young lady, but you're not old enough to be free range!'

"My once perky chicken breasts hang like flapjacks, I don't lay eggs anymore, I'm burning up with hot flashes, I'm...."

'Honey, the babysitter's here.'

A classic example of Poultry in Motion.

'I don't think we should have any more eggs Chester. Maybe you should see the vet about having your chicken nuggets removed.'

Chicken Funeral Planning.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken replies: 'I'm free-range pal, I can go where I like.'

'How do you prepare your chicken?' 'We just tell 'em they're gonna die.'

'With proper flossing there's no reason for hens to not have teeth.'

"No one can afford to eat us anymore."

"Come off it, you're not working from dawn till dusk: You're working at dawn and at dusk..."

"Maybe we'd kiss better if we had lips."

"Mum, I've heard that Faberge eggs are very valuable. What kind of animal is a Faberge?"

"Gesundtheit, Dear."

'Hey, look at this beauty... Man, I love those crunchy, well tanned sweethearts!'