Postpartum Discussion Pillows

Mums at play group.

'She knew we'd try to talk her-out of it.'

'My obstetrician recommended I nurture it in the interest of science.'

"You try staying this this after giving birth two million times."

"I hope you love me for my money, not for who I am."

"...some of these tadpoles may not be yours."

'It's the only way I was able to lose those last 10 pounds after Jason was born.'

''D' is for 'Despair'; 'E' is for 'Exhaustion'.'

'Oooh, I love what you've done with your hair...That top looks lovely on you and have you lost weight?'

"What would I suggest for a woman who has everything...a prenup!"

'...I really wish you would of told me you wanted to be a ballerina before we got married.'

'Cheer up. You'll be through postpartum depression and into empty nest elation before you know it!'

"How soon can I start her on fad diets?"

'I excuse my weight by saying I'm eating for three. Unfortunately, the twins were born months ago.'

There's no way I'm ready for kids

"What? It's been ten years. . . She's had six kids for goodness sake. She can't still be the fairest of them all!"

"You could say that. I had a D-section."

"Cheer up. You'll be through postpartum depression and into empty nest elation before you know it!"

'Post-maternity wear.'

"Mommy and Daddy are arguing again."

'The trouble with marriage is the unintended consequences.'

"Nintey-six kids? Well, you look amazing."

Bento XVI.

'Mom, did I come preassembled or did you and dad have to put me together?'

"My mother warned me about marrying a poltergeist... I don't know what possessed me!"

'Still five months to go....what a time to discover I suffer from claustrophobia.'

'Aww, cheer up. You'll be through postpartum depression and into the empty nest syndrome before you know it!'

NOW you tell me you don't want children?

"O.K., but if we get married, will you pretty much do everything?"

"Michael, you can’t be a ‘stay-at-home dad’ if we don’t have children!"

"Your postpartum depression can be traced to 'selling low' in your sock portfolio."

'I guess that's the deal. You get out of shape so I can get into shape.'

'When it comes to marriage, I'm a failure - but I'm very good at honeymoons!'

I'm amazed how quickly I returned to my normal shape after the birth.

'The right wing is a little uncomfortable. I was a Democrat.'