Postmodern Art Fan Pillows

His films need to be viewed with a post modernist sense of irony...

"I think that's one of his early 'blank canvases'. I think there are some bigger ones in the next room."

"No, ma'am. I'm not sure what the difference is between being creative or just plain weird."

Turd - 'It's one of a kind.'

Mr. Empirical With "Antarctica""Small is hostile. Rage contributes to shift away from literality. I'm off to True Value Hardware for some more self-reference tools."

Klimt Kiss Phones

"You're welcome."

'I can make out the nude, but I don't see the submarine.'

Pharaoh Cocoon

"I condensed my painting to the pure essence of the message. What helps me a lot is the fact that I've got nothing to say at all."

Giant Monster in Bath

"How do I know this isn't a performance art piece?"

'Number two. That's the art that offended me.'

'I'm going to add to the confusion. I'm going to sign my name upside-down.'

The Cremaster Cycle

"I'll give you $5 for that shirt."

'At least I never have to straighten it out.'

"By 'genius' do they mean the artist or the marketing department?"

"Still-Life of New Mexican Grilled Quail with Cilantro and Fennel-Flecked Confit."

"Don't you find her work just so wonderfully liberating!"

"She said it has a blistering fervency that reminds her of a slide."

"He begged his wife and kids to join him in Tahiti, but he didn't mean a word of it, the bastard."

"I'm not an Antony Gormley, I am Antony Gormley."

"Definitive." "Compelling." "Persuasive." "Upside down."

Woodworms at a sculpture gallery.

"Wentworth, could I take another look at that reorganization plan?"

Dogs looking at a fire hydrant in an art gallery.

"Their titles from left to right are, 'Holiday in Palm Springs','Next mortgage payment' and 'Deposit on a new Porsche'

'I have one just like this at home. My five year old son painted it.'

A skinny dog drawn with zen brush.

The Abstract, The Modernist, The Avant-Guard.

"Now, is this the kind of painting your Mommy would be proud to post on her Instagram?"

Metropolitan Art Center current exhibit: Father of the Finger-In-Your-Eye School of Modern Art.

'Picasso'