Postman Gifts

"That's the problem with e-mail - no one to bite."

Beware of Cynic.

Postman delivering a sack of mail through heavy snowdrift.

Post office sorting station employee sign: Don't shoot the messenger (or anyone else)

'They're extinct now but when I was young you'd find these everywhere...let's go to the next gallery they've got a 'bobby on the bear' and a 'postman' there.'

This Side Up.

"I'm taking a survey. Do you prefer to be growled or barked at?"

'We'll email the new offer just to make sure you get it.'

"Ordered fifty-eight days ago and it's here already!"

'To make up for the decline in snail mail deliveries, I've taken to biting my master every time he gets an e-mail.'

'I'm not afraid of commitment, but forever is a really long time.'

Postmodernist Pat, "the advent of 'electronic mail' has of course transcended the traditional 'sender-purveyor-receiver' relationship"

'He's cut his delivery time in half!'

"I'm posting off your cheque right now...airmail."

'This year I'm deliverying everything FedEx!'

'Smith...Jones...Pandora'

'The roofer said he will repair it if my check for the new roof clears the bank.'

Postman reads 'beware of Doug' sign. Man is hiding behind bin.

'I've got an epistle to the Corinthians, ten shekels postage due.'

'Ere what's your game It's been three weeks since you brought me a letter from my girlfriend.'

'Sign here.'

"Pushing the envelope. How about you?"

'Better add a little just to be on the safe side ? there may be another postage hike before it gets there.'

Pre man, Modern man, Post man

'It did say on the parcel, 'please do not bend'!'

'I want this sent first class - do we have any champagne bottles?'

Santa delivering newspapers

In 5 Years...

The Ghost of Christmas Post - a floating postman appears from a man's bedroom wall, two months late delivering his Christmas mail.

'So, the rumours are true! You have been friendly with the Postman! My own son! Shame on you!'

Postman Deposit All Junk Mail Here.

'Say, you've been working out!' A Weiner dog bites mail carrier on the butt.

Postman Pat and Noddy Road Rage

Snowman peeing in a corner as postman walks past

'And how about when they take the mail and just dump it right into the recycling bin? That's really harsh.'