Post-holiday Shopper Gifts

"Go Boxing Day shopping if you want...you couldn't drag me to that mall today!"

"It was terrifying experience being faced with that kind of compulsive, insane behaviour...I tell you it's positively the last time I put foot in the sales!"

'What do you do with the time you save?'

Mighty Man Of Justice Goes Christmas Shopping Part 1

"So last Christmas it was those Cabbage Patch Kids."

"I'd like a partridge in a pear tree, 2 turtle doves, 3 French hens, 4 calling birds and 7 swans a swimming."

Holiday Sales: The Starting Line

Cars follow the sign to the mall rather than the sign to the manger.

'Ahh...I see you travelling far and wide on a long fruitless mission but you still can't find a town centre parking space this Christmas...'

Black Friday

"Post-holiday dieting will be much easier this year. Our disposable cash flow will be diverted."

Seasonal shopping.

"I am in training for the sales."

"...And don't forget to include the receipts!"

'Good evening sir.Just wondering if you'd like to sample Night-Mart's new range of A-positive.'

Adrenaline is flowing down there with lots of last-minute, panicked Christmas shoppers! The DNA is frantically looking for heirlooms that'll be passed on in succeeding generations. It seems no price is too high for the helium atom - it's buying everything! Meanwhile, the neutron can't charge and hasn't been able to buy a single gift! Tempers are getting short! A big nerve angered other shoppers by blatantly cutting in the checkout line! And there's a quarrel over a parking spot with a whit

'Do I believe?? Listen, I believe in anything that generates $400 billion in annual sales!'

'The good news is, I got your Mum's cardigan.'

'I braved the Boxing Day sales just for you, dear.'

"Back here in 30 minutes?"

inflation at Christmas

The Nargleys perform their post-holiday ritual of trying to blow all the needles off the tree in one breath,

'Everything must go...manners included!'

'First I'd like to remind you of the true meaning of christmas - profits.'

Television and Christmas Sales

'Why not just serve Thanksgiving dinner in the shoe department next year and be done with it??'

'I think we should put a limit on how much we spend on each other at Christmas, like two hundred and twenty thousand pounds.'

"Wow, another turkey sandwich?"

"Maybe they should call it 'in the red' Friday."

Support your local bookstore

"I'm looking for something that expresses the spirit of the season but doesn't neglect the need for a credible deterrent."

'What I like about Christmas is that wonderful feeling of freedom when it's all over.'

Last-Minute Gifts

'I'm looking for a card that says if I didn't get you this, I'd never hear the end of it.'

Four Calling Birds - Smartphones sales boost Christmas spending.