Post-apocalypse Planner T-Shirts

"The scariest part is knowing that someday something'll come along that will make us go, 'Even the spider mutants weren't this bad.' "

"Fred's calculating what future natural catastrophes he can ignore based on his probably life span."

Squirrel putting nuts in a safe box.

A sun opens its mouth to eat a burning Earth

Zombie Problems

The End is Nigh

'If all goes according to plan, this garden should reach crisis proportions by midsummer.'

"This 'laying up treasures in heaven' thing - Is it some kind of tax dodge or what?"

"Can you estimate how much money you'll need for your mid-life crisis?"

'These guys aren't playing by the rules!!!'

'To prepare for Y2K, I backed up all discs and documents. . . stockpiled water and non-perishables. . . converted my investments to cash and set up a wood burning stove.'

"Efficiency tombs available"

"My next book? It will probably be about rising up and crushing humanity."

Zombie Fish

The other day during the zombie apocalypse

Post-Apocalypse Greeting Card

'Do you have a few minutes to discuss your retirement years, sir?'

Climate Change Contingency House

2 trilobites; 'So what are you going to be when you die - oil or gas?'

The final days of hair coloring

'My backup special...'

"The asteroid will hit in 2032, but I’m prepared!"

'Darling, I told you not to call me at work.'

'The end is near.'

'If the Mayan calendar is right, how should I back up my files?'

"Chief, I'd like a four-year sabbatical to prepare for the millennium."

"No, you can't go out like that. Just because the world is ending is no reason to dress like a heathen."

'Ferguson always was an overachiever.'

"It's my life line in case the rapture happens, so I'm not left behind."

"My cousin is lucky, he lives on the 14th floor. I'm sure he has a great view of the end of the world."

It's 11 p.m. do you know if your portfolio allocation will carry you through armageddon?

'Well, that's just great...zombies! There goes the neighbourhood!'

"Today our quest continues for someone who can come up with a solution for dealing with the partisan gridlock in Washington."