Popularity Seeker T-Shirts

"The Curse of the robot followers: At first, Rob was thrilled with the all the attention and followers."

"You may be man's 'best friend' but I have over 2,123 likes on facebook!"

'I wish I were as popular as the coffee machine.'

Likes: $2.

'I have no new Facebook friend requests today. See that I do before lunchtime.'

Bob didn't win the race. He was just better - looking.

'Good party, Sid...I nearly ostracised myself with everybody!'

"Good news! We found her on social media! By the way, she has 459 friends."

"I built this tree house for my kids. But it's so private, I've decided to use it as my home office."

'This is a 'placebo' line. It serves no purpose but it makes us feel good.'

Sauvignon Bonk

"Son, you're old enough now for The Talk: everything you need to know about compound interest."

'Dammit - how do we get in on that gross national product?'

Three businessmen using a pulley system to change a graph

Our Motto: Buy Low Sell High is the Best Revenge.'

"Listen Herb, once you become the boss and decide who gets a raise, then you can have a raise."

"Nothing else in my room can spin on the floor like a bottle."

"There's gotta be a way to make money off this."

"I'm sorry, but you didn't recognize me as the Messiah when I had braces and glasses."

"Who's ready to see what's going to happen in the fourth quarter?"

'Bring me some more power.'

Wearing a sales chart as a name badge.

Classic Autos: We have muscle cars for weaklings!

Danae's Celebrity Career: 'Don't you know who I am?...I've decided to pursue a career as a celebrity, so I'm developing the basic language skills used in the industry.'

'Get me public relations!'

Business Outlook

'I'm looking for a job that satisfies my lust for power.'

'You're my economic advisor. What'll I do?'

'I took my money out of the bank and put it into municipal bonds...'

"What's the best way to break up a marriage?"

"I suppose you're wondering why I've summoned you here at 3 AM, minion." "I try not to wonder." "After crunching the numbers, I've determined we'd increase profits by being open 24/7." "We're in the suburbs. Everyone's asleep." "Not true. By being closed at 3 AM, we're missing out on the potentially-lucrative Igor the Wino clientele." "Go to the alley and give Igor a 1-for-the-price-of-2 coupon." "Very bad man."

"OK, now you can sing your heart out."

Glass Ceiling

"No, no - I'm just looking for a balance of power that corrupts in moderation."

"And this all happened in the last week..."