Pondering Professional Pillows

"If a stock falls in the market, and it had no investors, does it really lose its value?"

"What a tragedy... he still had two years of his super left..."

'The economy being what it is, we've had to make a few changes in your retirement plan. . .'

"Mrs. Marsha Mullhouse, of Kenosha, Wisconsin, asks, "Are You subject to the laws of physics, or are the laws of physics subject to You?"

'The organizational structure is pretty simple: We do the work; they take the credit.'

"Apparently over 50% of people never look at their pension plans!"

"People are looking for stability in pension arrangements..."

'At least I don't have his life.'

"You never actually own a pension pot - you merely look after it for the next government."

Wherever the Trail Leads. . .

"Events seem to be headed in the right direction. Unfortunately, it's not taking me with it."

"I just learned that my golden parachute was not properly packed."

'We'll skip that rubbish.'

'When bad 401ks happen to good people'

Passing the Pension Time Bomb

Doubt or Certainy

Retirement Issues

"I'm the ghost of your future retirement."

'Beryl, I've been thinking.....'

'I re-invested what was left of my 401K into returnable pop cans. I figure by the time I retire I should have about three dollars.'

"The real trick will be enjoying retirement long enough before the Government goes belly up."

"My inner child just turned 62. Where's his money?"

I am so late for a hair appointment

'Do you ever wonder about this whole 'money' thing?'

"Why are we here?"

Upside down question mark hanging from fishing line.

'Sorry I can't pay your pension until I see gray hair. . . Oh yes, and you also get disability.'

"Walter Thruggins, My Life as a Pensions Adviser."

No Action Comics

'At last you can put your feet up and concentrate on worrying about your pension.'

'The mind-body problem is best expressed in the formulation...OOf!'

'We seem to be at that point where science leaves off and theology begins.'