Political Humor Fan Pillows

Trump or Creamsicle?

'It's the competitive tendering process.'

'Coalition of the willing.'

'It's a 300 page government questionnaire about cutting back on bureaucracy!'

"Sire, they also want dental."

Three wise men give gifts to Jesus and sign a Register of Donors.

"Megalomaniac is such a passe label. We prefer to call it mediocrity challenged these days."

Self Serve Road Repair.

"I think I'm just going to sit this recession out."

'True, but fraud and waste in government is an important part of our economy.'

"Are there several doctors in the house, so we can have a little managed competition?"

'We have to make huge cuts in spending, which means. . . Difficult decisions ahead which means. . . We hire more consultants!'

National scapegoat committee: 'So that's agreed - once again we blame shortsighted, lefthanded redheads.'

'What burns me is those bums who evade US taxes by being born in some foreign country and just staying there!'

"There are some things medical science cannot explain...like where the hell our health care system is heading."

"The NHS will honour it's pledge to care for everybody from cradle to grave(ly ill)"

A Federal Agency to Eliminate Federal Agencies

'. . . It's not a bribe, it's a personalised stimulus package.'

"Start the economy."

'I'm a mud-slinging politician. Get it?'

Where's This Kid's Birth Certificate?

'My mom's pregnant. At first I was worried about the competition until I remembered that I was the incumbent.'

Robin Hood with sacks of money - 'Sorry, these are for the middleclasses.'

Job Centre, "Terrorism is all you know?... Have you ever thought of a job as a school teacher?!"

'I can't find ANY of our hidden agendas!'

'Will you bogus-marry me?'

Oliverachy - Short-lived political system where leaders were chosen by how many olives they could fit in their mouths.

"Major Funding. How much do you need?"

When the President's adviser makes a mistake.

NHS development plan

An Unnamed Sauce

'It's fifty bucks for a half hour, and of course ten percent of that goes to the disaster relief fund.'

Sadly, Harper had never heard of the Nigerian letter scam.

Bodyguards.

I.R.S: Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country.'