Political Dabbler T-Shirts

"We know them socially - not politically."

"Umm ... not sure what notes you'll detect on your palate, but it'll get you ripped."

"I appreciate your devices that make it seem like you're paying attention, but could you actually pay attention and make eye contact so I know you are?"

'Miss Carruthers, check and see if we have an extradition treaty with Disneyland.'

'Why don't you try seeing it from your point of view?'

'Everybody on the internet now knows I'm a dog, so I'm pretending to be a cat.'

Community church - the home of religion lite - Sermon: 'Atheism? You may be right!'

'I think I'm decisive. Can I get back to you on that?'

Desk sign: 'Brown-nose'.

Election slot machine. No matter the outcome, I always lose money.

Chief Foreign Policy Advisor to President Obama.

'Thou shall not covet the neighbours same sex partner.'

My first mistake.

'When the school upgraded its operating system, for the third time, I upgraded my headache medicine from over-the-counter to prescription strength.'

"Norman's really into wild paddling."

"Do you know why you never made VP? Indecisiveness. You're still indecisive!"

'Investors Chronicle' "How do I know whether to buy it or not?"

'Well, do you want to sign up or not?' - 'Um...yes and no.'

"That's not all I do. Actually I'm a psychological counselor- gymnast-motivational speaker-relaxation therapist-sex worker."

The Screeeen!

'I can't get the hang of this cloud computing...'

'I don't surf the net, I just kind of dog-paddle through it.'

'Excuse me. Could you point me towards the books that would look impressive on my bookshelf?'

"Okay, we all know how this is done. There are 4 of you and only 3 regional manager openings. Margaret - start the music."

Vote for Ken and his congestion charge.

"When I evolve I'm going to be an elephant."

AUKUS Alliance

"They're everywhere, I don't know what to believe anymore. What is truth, what are facts, what's happening?" "Stop watching the news and if you see a pollster or election candidate...run!"

'He's at the 'awkward stage' in converting to paperless so he carries both a laptop and a briefcase.'

'You've got to quit asking yourself 'What would Tintin do?''

Merkel & Europe

Disraeli 'The Political Leotard'

"I'm scanning these old photos we're afraid of losing into my computer so I can lose them there."

A knitter's in and out boxes

"You can't 'unfollow' me - I'm your shepherd."