Political Aid T-Shirts

"He's giving the white-collar voters' speech to the blue collars."

"All our models point to an uptick in 2021, but after that it doesn't look good for you, Edward."

"The latest numbers are in. More voters want you to drop out than run."

The president's men

"Based on the feedback from advisers whom I haven't beheaded, all of my ideas are great."

Public Relations: Reputations cleaned and repaired

First you're a law student, then you're a lawyer, then you're a judge, then you're a politician, then you're a criminal.

SAGE mentality

"Beware of Don"

'Yes, it's a stupid speech, Senator, but you've got to court the stupid VOTE.'

Rock and a Hard Place

'This 'infrastructure' stuff you keep talking about -- does it have anything to do with vegetables?'

"I'm not spinning - I'm contextualizing."

"Rudy has asked me to apologize, on his behalf, for your being offended..."

"No, no, that’s in a bar, Mr. President — you can talk politics and religion here."

'For five years you can't get a single politician to take any notice of you...and then half a dozen turn up at once!'

'If you have to ask, you can't afford it.'

'Is our tent getting smaller, or are we fat cats just getting fatter?'

"Our intelligence shows that everybody loves us."

Automatic Congressman

Half a house is better than none.

"Our rule of thumb is: 'Keep it complicated' - so no one will understand how we choose a candidate."

Nurturing Activism

"He's only been president a few months. Just give hima little time."

"What kind of politician would I be if I didn't politicize this crisis?"

The Election Strategy

'Taking bribes is understandable, Senator, but you really shouldn't keep billing records.'

"Some of it is soft and some of it is hard, but the main thing is that all of it is money."

'I wouldn't put much faith into Senator Bludgeon's promise to immediately begin investigating the competition. After all, it takes 30 days just to make instant coffee in the Senate.'

"Is there a spin doctor in the house?"

"Eric, this is your father, mister Trump." "You must have the wrong number. I'm Mortimer Park."

Another Rogue Trader

Voting in the UK

"Find out what the people want so I can tell it like it is."

'He's trying to fine-tune the economy again.'