Policy Followers Pillows

"Now that President Trump raised the age for retirement I enjoy a lot more free time and it keeps my mother-in-law busy."

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

Dog Crossing

Dog tries to obey No Dog sign

Think Tank

'What I call a miracle drug is one that doesn't start a government investigation.'

'That's our corporate ladder.'

"Turn off cell phones violators will be over ruled."

Worthless B*****ds

Office computer: 'Thank you for not using me for personal business.'

'Here are the safety manuals you wanted'

"Until you're top management, Warrick, I strongly suggest you stay within the lines."

"The deadline for compliance just kicked in."

WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN, 'It's okay, I guess, but they sure hassle you about compliance!'

'It's from the Federal Trade Commission -- we have to put in a non-smoking section.'

She didn't know when her baby climbed onto the prize pile, but she could never turn her back on the international Carny code of law.

'... And as soon as it's discovered, don't play with fire!'

Business man must jump through hoops to impress his boss.

"Poppa, can you read me the Riot Act again?"

Angel with speed camera.

'...so until you get your own place - you live by our rules!'

'The way I see it, deficit spending keeps the taxpayers on their toes.'

"Oh-now I see where we part company. You are cleaving unto the spirit of the law, while I am cleaving to the letter of the law!"

"Do you mind? I'm reading the prospectus carefully before investing."

'This won't take long, Senator -- I'm a single-issue nut.'

"You were doing the speed limit. I found that suspicious."

'He had it coming to him - he didn't follow government guidelines.'

Illegal abortions and surgeries are causing deaths in women

'I didn't care much for the first ACA, but I'd like to suggest a second ACA. The 'Affordable Congressman Act.''

Going to Greece in a Handbasket.

'It's a whole new twist - a straight-laced detective who does everything by the book.'

Sign Stating 'Keep off the Grass! Thy Tresspasses will Not be Forgiven."

'Have you got an Environmental Impact Statement for that castle, son?'

'That's our safety director. He takes safety very seriously.'

Lawyer with two desk organizers: Letter of the Law and Spirit of the Law.