Policy Dodger Pillows

"Baldo, remember our rules! No talking on cell phones during work hours!"

"Joey, you're supposed to wash your hands before returning to work."

"I don't want a G.O.A.T, I want a S.C.A.P.E.G.O.A.T."

'Let's keep in mind that although quitters never win, they often manage to avoid litigation.'

Scapegoat of the Year

Darren had lost his edge as a 'yes' man...

How lazy people decide what to eat

"How was first grade? I don't know yet. I spent all day in the Principal's office."

Please Wait Here To Be Scolded

'Greenspan today explained the reason the Fed faises interest rates is so they can lower them again.'

"You go on ahead. I'm going to hang out here for the next few months until everyone stops saying the word 'caucus.'"

"Do I get to lawyer up before I see the Principal?"

"Not sure what to watch? Go to menu/settings/power/off/pick up a book."

Yomp Trucking Inc...My way or the highway!

"Make up your mind - will you or won't you?"

Election Cancelling Headphones

Thank You For Not Giving Me Your Views About Brexit

"The answer is NO!"

Procrastinator's Leap.

Revenuers will be shot.

'Sorry, I can't talk now, Mr. Harris, I'm texting right now! I'll take whatever punishment you want to give me.'

Bring your dog to work day - let someone else make the big decisions.

End of crisis

'We bought this bolt hole to get away from politicians talking green politics.'

'No more!'

"Heads we go with the analytics. Tails we don't."

"Up to now, I feel my childhood experience has been a very positive one! Why spoil it with some silly rules?"

'We're going to need a specialist. To help fill in the insurance form.'

"It's weird... My boss has a freaky way of seeing through my excuses. It's like a sick sense."

"Just you wait 'till your father comes home!"

"If there is a processing problem, just come to me, and please, no whimpering in the cubicles."

'When he asks what you've brought to the table, just shrug your shoulders...he thrives on indecisiveness.'

"No, you may not request a change of venue."

"I didn't make the Dean's list, but I made the Principal's list."

"I've never been in there. Most of my down-time is spent in the Principal's office."