Police Procedural Follower Mugs

"I don't get it. How did you know I was going to mug you?"

Trial by Media

"But he had a mask and I thought he was a burglar."

'I'm afraid I can't take you to my leader without a prior appointment.'

"My problem is a recessive gene for honesty and a dominant gene for robbery."

"Says, property of the I.R.S."

'Come on inspector, you call this fair?'

"Welcome to the French Quarter!"

"I'm sorry- when you said 'bad' cop, I assumed you meant incompetent."

Cat points to the dog who injured him, at a police station.

The Investigation

Moon Line UP

'We have a positive ID on the spacecraft, Mr. Ferguson. Now, if you can identify the one who abducted you, we won't keep you any longer!'

'Jimmy. Stick to the outline.'

'Take a good look at this police sketch and try to remember if you've seen anybody who can draw better.'

'A dynamite sales idea, Lou. I'm just sorry I have to notify the police.'

'Man that REALLY BUGS ME when a robbery call out turns into a WILD-GOOSE chase!' (Police chasing a goose driving a car).

"He'll crack. We're using the good cop, ambiguous cop, perplexed coop, detached cop, forgetful cop, bad cop scenario."

'You have the right to remain silent.'

The Executioner's Identity Lineup

"Pretty good turnout for a Monday."

"And I was all like - severed head in a sack? What severed head in a sack?"

"The suspect is roughly 55 feet tall and quite possibly green."

"Hello, police? I don't normally do this, but this looks like a very suspicious mole..."

Dog Points Out Dog-Catcher in lineup.

Torn between taking the advice in her hiking manual and her impulse to help, Morgan Hirschi is frozen with indecision.

"I can watch more 'Law & Order' than any man in this bar."

"Look, I did bring you in here for questioning. I want to know if you like my new tie."

'That's not good enough!'

'No I'm sorry madam, this is the celebrity murder squad'.

'He should be okay, it's just a little tap on the head.'