Points Collector Gifts

Online Shopping.

'Geoffrey got a triple word score! . . .no, we weren't playing scrabble, I give him points if he strings three words together.'

'About these points that you keep putting on my licence. Can I redeem them for consumer goods?'

'With my frequent flyer miles I was able to get a seat upgrade from the luggage compartment.'

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

"Awww man. My nuts are so old they're wrinkled." "Tell me about it."

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

Thank you bubbles

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

'I'm having trouble with my drinking. Arthritis in my elbow.'

"Blast, you've cleaned me out again!" Grey squirrels out competing red squirrel for food.

"Just toot my horn and I'll be there."

'I call it a flat.'

His cubicle had come to be known as 'Teddy Bear Heaven'.

Philosopher trading cards.

The Card Flinger

"Are you happy with your current ball?"

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

"My dad says this pencil was once used by William Shakespeare." "Is it 2B or not 2B?"

'It's a snow mobile.'

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

Greeting card section: 'thank you' and 'you're welcome'.

"Too much club."

'And in addition it seems that he has been eating some of the other children'.

"Fetch, Ernie, fetch!"

Red Card - Gold Card.

"It's a flip phone. I guess we can document this as an ancient, archaeological discovery."

"I'm sorry, I can't assist with this request."

"I wonder what this was for."

Card shark

'I'm a football referee - I'll have a box of red and a box of yellow.'

Business people buying greeting cards.

Toast kidnapper.

'How old is this vase?'