Pointillism Fan Pillows

"My method of painting is pointillism."

Dietician to man: 'To address your spare tire we must first get in touch with your inner tube.'

"No Timmy, I don't think your pencil has system requirments or upgrades you can download from the internet."

'Take it from me and come back. The future is definitely on land.'

The Origami Society...

Well la de da. . .

Hamlet in the craft shop.

"I need a special pencil for math...one with a lot less wood and a lot more eraser."

Cello player with pencil instead of bow

Deer Cross Dressing.

'Two men having a sword fight with large pen and pencil.'

Forty-five words per minute? Impossible!

Cyclopetrist's Waiting room

"Sorry, Martin, but because you're the weakest link in our food chain here, you're fired."

Clown Painting in Museum

"Don't disturb Daddy darling: he's just received his new issue of "Basic Tools Monthly"..."

Pencil sharpeners in hell

'Yes, the wood on this pencil is from a renewable source.'

"That's ridiculous. I do not have a superiority complex."

'Stranger?.. No, it's definitely a tall, dark strangler.'

'If you think using a stick is evolutionary, wait till you try one these dipped in chocolate.'

"I'll pencil you in for recess."

Man reading on top of giant pencil being carried by others.

'Man in suit wears tie in shape of a pencil.'

Pop Up Pointillism.

"You're goin' up the river, Sammy."

"The scientists are coming back to study us, so I want you both to be on your best behaviour this time!"

Back to School

A lumberjack leans against a giant pencil that reads "Giant Sequoia Brand No .2".

"Bill!..That woman staring at you from the bushes, isn't that Jane Goodall"