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"Oh, Jeff, you swore this wasn't a podcast."

"The following program was made possible by fluctuations in the random chaos of the Universe...."

"And the letterbox version, how does that make you feel."

'Now for today's numbers...'Bad Dogs' outnumbered 'Good Dogs' by two-to-one...'

'The anger management is working... tonight there were fewer veins popping.'

"I finally gave in, I got sick of hearing, 'Polly want a podcast?... Polly want a podcast!'"

Big screen TV falling through floor

"We'd better stock up on TV snacks in the event of war."

I can hear a podcast of yesterday's sea.

"The end of my favorite series is near."

'No, you can't just watch the end of Bargainhunt!'

'Hello Mr Preston? This is an ALIEN speaking. We have landed in your paddock. We have mutilated your cows. We have made loud crashing noises...what the hell is on your TV that's so special?'

"Please don't watch this show! There's a viewer trigger warning and a short fuse alert."

NOVA. Don't worry --- The "vacuum of space" is not that kind of vacuum.

"Welcome back to the We Were Bored and Had Nothing Else To Do podcast."

Can't Touch This

'The inaugural address? It's sort of like an opening monologue.'

'During the next commercial, I'd like to talk to you about your childhood.'

"It's hard being a TV viewer trapped in the body of a student."

The cradle of mankind

"When did you first notice you were larger than life?"

Triceratops watching television with satellite dish made from own horns.

'So, ten thousand pounds could be yours if you call in and answer this question...Why the hell aren't you in bed?!'

Which Hogwarts house are you?

Is it a book? A film? A TV show? How do you mime a podcast?

Do you go for Hannity or O'Reilly? Tough call. O'Reilly's presence is so big, fearless. Whereas Hannity has a wicked fast tongue and such inner strength. As symbolized externally by his jawline. O'Reilly is so tall. Something strange is happening. Coulter's a bit masculine for my tastes. Ditto. HOJ.

'Dear, you're not supposed to take it seriously...it's a reality show!'

"Is anything good on?"

"Can you do battle with him later?... He's watching, 'Game of Thrones'."

'Do you want to watch the, 'everything's terrible' cable news or the 'everything's wonderful' cable news?'

"See! He's taking a first sip. . . my eye! Oops!!"

"Don't worry, honey. This is just for our murder podcast."

'This has a great ending...he shoots her.'