Plot Twist Enthusiast Pillows

"The problem is there's no engine. Just a mysterious plot device."

"Better than Chekhov"

"Benedict will learn that Shana is his daughter. Mike will resign from the police force because of his involvement with Carla. Jim will share a kiss with Nora after accusing Hope of having a fling with Nate to spite Derek. Philip and his sidekick Addis

"These things work better if you don't explain the plot."

'That's a turn up for the book.'

Book Shop Plot Spoilers

"It's about sex and revenge, except for a short chapter on the Continental Congress."

It was my story. A murder mystery. A who-done-it-and-got-away-with-it-until-he-wrote-about-it.

'And I love the part when he finds out that it was his brother all along!'

Subway Thrillers

"I'm sorry, my therapist told me to give up slaying dragons."

"I don't mind car chases as long as they're car chases about something."

“I’ve got an idea for a story: Gus and Ethel live on Long Island, on the North Shore. He works sixteen hours a day writing fiction. Ethel never goes out, never does anything except fix Gus sandwiches and in the end she becomes a nympho-lesbo-killer-whore. Here’s your sandwich”

'This has a great ending...he shoots her.'

10 commandments

"Now THAT'S what I call a surprise ending!!"

'Gosh, he looks so peaceful lying there, I almost hate to wake him up and put him in the oven.'

If Shakespeare were alive today

"Mr. Dankin, the plumber will see you now."

"We love your manuscript! It's exactly the sort of big, sprawling epic we've been looking for!"

"We need a plot twist."

"Don't fall for it! He's just trying to fatten you up for Thanksgiving!"

He Didn't Know How To Appreciate Nature

"It's a novel about loss, and redemption, and fantastic sex."

Crime

'Yeah, yeah, the ammo is included. ... OK, so remember - anyone asks? You've never seen me before in your life.'

"No, I don't mind if you peek,' said the mystery writer to the next victim.

Mid-list Author Magazine

"What can I get you?" "An explanation for that dumb reason why Batman and Superman stopped fighting at the end of Batman v Superman." "Would you like that spoiler-filled or spoiler-free?" "Spoiler-filled would be lovely, please." "Ok. Batman did not stop fighting Superman just because both of their moms were named 'Martha.'" "'Martha' was not just a person. In Batman’s nightmares, 'Martha' had come to represent all that was good about him." "When Superman whispered 'Martha,' it did t

Ssshhh!!!!! - Lover and burgler trying to keep quite

'The vet did it.'

"Did you like that mystery book?"

Goldilocks and the Three Little Pigs

'I like the lust,greed and sex - it's just the integrity that bothers me.'