Pledge Drives Pillows

"First, I sent a rocket of a drive down the fairway, then I took the 7-iron, put that ball on the green...a hundred and eighty yards if it was an inch..."

My other car has a bumper sticker that says this on it too.

"Another slander suit!"

Route 666.

Bike powered computer.

"I told him he was allowed one phone call. He's making a pledge to Channel 13."

Heavy Traffic.

"Ma'am, do you know how well you were driving?"

"This one contains our tailgating deterrent feature."

Gas eyedropper.

'Another short-cut, dear?'

I've stopped you so often I've decided to give you a season ticket!

Danger: Reading warning signs costs lives.

GPS: 'Sorry return to the main road.'

"We know it was meant to be. We illegally downloaded the exact same music!"

"Just accept the ticket and let's go. The hot dog's getting cold."

Distraction Next Exit: Almost there.

'Now I know why this Satnav was going out cheap.'

"Dry cleaning, pet store, Salvation Army - I'd be lost without my stickies on the dash!"

Puddle Jumper

'Why do they call it rush hour when no one goes anywhere?'

Surgeon requests patient's motorbike if operation is unsucessful.

Baby kangaroo has a seatbelt on.

Parking

'The miles per gallon it gets for city driving is an urban legend.'

Smelling Salts at the Petrol Station.

'Whoa - you're not murdering anybody today until you get your seat belt on, mister backseat psychopath!'

'May I help you?'

'He used to be a train driver.'

Al's City Toe Truck Service.

Last exit to return and get what you forgot

Seat belts - the giving of life,

"Contrary to popular belief, this city was in fact founded on post-funk dubtronica."

"They're for water hazard holes."

"No! It's 'Good morning everyone' and certainly not 'Hi there guys and gals!'"