Playful Pretender T-Shirts

"I can't go to school today, Mom . . . I'm running a low-grade spring fever."

Grocer with pretensions of being a soldier

Kid sweeps dirt under his junk on the floor.

"I always drink from a travel mug. It makes me feel like I'm out of the house."

"Don't worry, dear. You'll grow."

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

Gracie goes to get cookies for Santa, but Papi has eaten them all.

A cow poos down a hole.'UH-OH!'

'He barks when he sees the boss coming.'

Boy rolled into a snowball

Revenge of the Jelly Mother.

'Take two tootsie rolls and call me in the morning.'

Resourceful toddler

"If they want a snowball fight, then I'll give them one."

"You see, it's perfectly safe to tease him..."

Tuning Up for the Air Guitar Competition

Boy makes snowman around a lamp post.

Tamagotchi paralysis.

"Bruh, that is some SERIOUS kazoo."

'It's okay, there's a trampoline under the snow.'

'Off hand I'd say she needs re-stuffing.'

'Say low-cholesterol dairy-free alternative to cheese!'

'This is your spinal column...It's a bunch of bones that runs up and down your back and keeps your legs from going all the way up to your neck.'

Kick Me! (sign on an anthropomorphized soccer ball)

'I did it all from memory.'

Teddy Time Bears

"Ok, I found a secure line."

Ooooh! Someone got a carrot job! Someone got a carrot job!

'Hi, this is Batman. You've reached the Batcave. I'm not in right now but as soon as I return I'll call you bat.'

"And this Halloween, try not to make a specter of yourself."

Clown Skis.

"We can speak freely now. I've encrypted the line."