Playful Gastronome Mugs

Christmas canape?

"Chocolate? I can't be allergic to chocolate! I'm a kid, can't you say I'm allergic to spinach or broccoli?"

'I'll have the bacon and hay wrap.'

"I remember his last words were, 'Another bite and I'll burst!'..."

Recipes from The Lying Gourmet

'Another neat trick is to cut regular spaghetti into little pieces, and next thing you know you've got yourself a bowl of spaghetti-i-s.'

"Just a pinch, Helga ... spicy eye of newt doesn't agree with me."

Better Not Squash.

'Why is it taking so long to eat your soup?'

"There are no croutons. I use tater tots on my salad."

'Tomato ketchup?' 'Well you wanted the house red.'

"Everybody's doing quinoa—at least Kamut still has a nice grainier-than-thou quality."

'And it comes with oven mitts, butter, sour cream and chives.'

'What wine do you recommend with the peanut butter-filled, deep fried, jalapeno bacon bombs?'

Sushi Train Set.

Dave's Hamburger Shop

The Good Feud Guide - 'Delia Smith does a nice roasted Worrall-Thompson.'

"I've been a chef for far too long...."

"The tiny red things were harvested from Frankie's bonsai tree."

Stand back - while I whip something up

"Here comes the tossed salad!"

Boy who has eaten oysters and grown fat

A Donut Ride Outside of a Police Station

Frisbee dog catching pizza dough

"If dinner was a reality TV show broccoli would be the first thing I'd vote off!!"

"Relax sir, I'm sure chef barely remembers you posting a negative review online."

Diners sit in high chairs, wear bibs and eat baby food. Man says: 'I love this place, it's just so retro.'

Sushi For Men...

'I'll trade you, sight unseen.'

'Carrot cake!.. What's next?.. Broccoli cake?'

"Stop playing with your food and eat your dinner!"

Football Pudding

"He's just p****d off, because these days, I'm more popular than he is."

'These are exquisite! You simply must give me your recipe.'

'It's a chocolate patch!'