Playdate Wrangler Gifts

'Don't forget to take your tranquilizers Daddy, little Jimmy is coming round to play.'

"Can we please just stick to the core business?"

"Can Olaf come out to pillage and plunder?"

"See this jelly wobbling. It was waving goodbye."

"Give him time, - if anyone can break that swing set, it's O'l Tex."

She - Interpreter - He.

'I told you to invite a friend over.'

Boy and his dog

Kids with Fish Balloons

"Excuse me, but I believe you are in my seat."

High Riders of the Old West

"Dammit Harold, you know I hate that mask!"

'Your wife says you act like a fool. I thought you said she never pays attention to you.'

"Just ignore it. It's a mirage."

'Can Anna come out and ride?'

'It's only 6 AM, but I want to send the kids to Wally's house before his mother sends him over here.'

Sulk Shows

"You kept me awake all night, grinding your gums."

"No, I don't play. I just watch people play on the internet."

"I fell in love with her. Then she mutated."

Teddy Bear

'Hold on there Jethro! You know I don't tolerate that kind of horseplay in this joint.'

Counselor. It's annoying that he always has to have the second-to-last word

'That's the last time I ask you to tie my shoe laces!'

Kid to kid: 'I can't be wearing out my welcome. I didn't even step on it.'

"Could you speak a little louder? I'm recording this."

"Marriage is driving me crazy and she's my designated driver!"

"It's cute that yours has a Fire Island share, mine has the East Hampton Dream House."

Kids and Mobile Addictions

'The sleepover was great Mum: Timmy's house is a pigsty just like ours...'

"Jeez, these things are hot."

'OK...now what?'

Attack of the 65 - Inch Woman

'Did you want me, boss?'

'Can Bradley come out and litigate?'