Play Mugs

"Recess is over, Your Honor."

'You play ball with me and I'll play ball with you!'

'I'd love to play house, Kevin, but I've got a business to run.'

"And the crowd roars."

Jimmy says you're a poopyhead. Do you have a rebuttal?

'You know what I just noticed about playing outside? No pop-up windows.'

'Let's play house. You be the stay-at-home dad, and I'll be the career mom.'

Sandboxes

'Interesting. At first, I didn't pick her as dominant.' - Child chairs meeting at Toys Inc.

'Wait a minute! I think our line has been tapped.'

'AQ popgun? I want a field model Browning pump chambered for the 3-inch magnum load.'

'James let his inner-child out, but he can't figure out how to put it back in.'

'We've been playing house for 5 minutes, and she's already nagging me to get a job.'

Play-Doh vs Work Doh

'The only imaginable solution to this problem is a battle to the death.'

'God went to a lot of trouble to invent gravity. The least we can do is use it.'

"I guess breakable things need to be more careful around me."

"We tried to play nicely, but frankly it's not as much fun as tormenting each other."

"This will help you make unbiased decisions, AND stay cootie-free."

"Don't forget to wash your hands."

Bubbles

"I won't enumerate my trespasses. You know my work."

'Now she's jealous of my imaginary playmate.'

"Well, you said your glasses needed cleaning!"

'If you don't like war toys. . . we have an identical set, but the box is labelled PEACE KEEPER ACTION FIGURES.'

'Bad news? I got into a fight with a mud puddle. Good news? I won.'

'Hang in there, Sandra. In a few years we'll be tormenting them.'

Rocking horse and rocking camel.

'I really enjoy our sandbox time together, Aiden, but I don't think I'm ready to commit to a long-term relationship.'

Remote control bridge in bath.

"How's the game of hide and seek going?"

"Everyone, welcome our new Vice President of Irritating Noises!"

'Red rover, red rover, send Billy right over!'

Suction-cup marks: Just one of the reasons wall hockey never caught on.

Kennel Club is closed for staff training