Plant Shopper Pillows

"Where are the perineums?" "Aisle 3. Between the vaginas and the rectums."

'Make sure you pretend to water it.'

Maybe I should have measured my garden before going shopping....

'It appears he hit an iceberg.' (A LETTUCE)

Plants Cheer as They Get Watered.

Palms. When fully grown that species will provide some nice shade in your your yard. Fronds with benefits.

Yardless: Please help

"Maureen Alsop is leaving her magnolia, and her delphinium and her cats with us this weekend."

'Congratulations on your 100% plant-based diet. I'm referring you to a botanist.'

'Esther, is it possible, just possible mind you, that your green thumb has gone berserk?'

"Would the widdle Venus fly trap like a fly? You'll have to beg for it."

"Have you guys seen my recent collab with the universe?"

"Good morning. Fen, Boscage, Bracken & Spinney."

'The forest is so dark and gloomy: It's nice to reach the emergence and get a bit of sunshine...'

Herbophiles protest mass killings of plants.

"Which of these will look the prettiest without the others?"

"Is the asparagus farm-raised or wild-caught?"

"Just a couple of ninety cent seed packets, and you can have fresh garden vegetables for heaven knows how long."

Mantis Love

Gardening#2

'That plant food really works!'

"Hey! Plants are on sale again! Woo-hoo!"

Couple using thier new garden hose in the rain

Jeff realised it was probably time to discontinue his subscription to 'Office Plant of the Month'.

A Venus cow trap.

"No, dude. Smoke the grass first. Then eat the candy."

The Venus Flytrap Leather Sectional

An expecting Flower wearing a 'Baby here, arrow t-shirt' saying BUD

"I do like a plant that can hold its drink"

'You need to do something about your dry skin.'

'You're still keen on organic gardening then!'

A drooping plant is watered via an IV tube.

'Don't you think it's time you tackled the wandering dew?'

Conservation bookshelf has a dead plant on top of it.

Pea