Plant-powered Friend Pillows

'I'm a vegetarian.' - 'If it's so wrong to eat animals, why are they made out of meat?'

"States of tofu"

Queen of Quinoa

"Mom, I'm at work – let me call you back after I finish stocking milk for wealthy vegans who like beet juice in their meat alternatives so they can still get that bloody effect when cooking without guilt."

"Is the asparagus farm-raised or wild-caught?"

Veggie Hall of Fame.

"We would like to be genetically modified to taste like Brussels sprouts."

"I don't care if it's plant-based, you're creeping everyone out."

Vegetarian Nightmare.

'Dad, you know that I'd never buy a pet that eats meat. Luckily, I found a guy who sold me the World's only vegetarian dog!'

'I'm writing a vegetarian cook book.'

"How would you like your soy protein, mixed tocopherols and methylcellulose patty?"

Peas on Earth.

"I just found a lacto-vegan restaurant and Janet from accounts says she's FRUITAIAN!"

"OK, hands up who’s vegan... lactose intolerant... peanut allergies..."

"Our vegan dishes are the same as what cows eat: Nitrates, Pesticides, Ammonia, Antibiotics..."

'New Barbeque.'

"But Herman, we can't just throw in the towel like that."

"No animals were harmed during this performance!"

"How did you cure your dog of begging for food?"

"It helps if you think of it as a turkey."

Dale regretted going to the Vegan restaurant.

"'Tofu'? Qu'est-ce que c'est 'tofu'?"

The early days of tofurkey.

'The only vegan item on the menu is the menu itself.'

"How almond milk is made"

"It's not addicting, all natural, recycled and plant-based...it's cud!"

Where we get veggie burgers

"Were you genuinely interested in where I get my protein, or was it the introductory question to a long and pointless attack on my personal dietary choices?"

'I'll try the 'Hippy meal'.'

"Is that true love or what? My masters are vegetarians, but they still buy me juicy bones..."

Go Veggie...

International Carrot Day April 4th

"Alrighty, we've got three Tofu Pad Thais, four Green Curry Lunch Specials, side of Veggie Dumplings, and three Summer Rolls with Peanut Dipping Sauce."

'You want to become a vegan?... Well okay, but you do realise there'll be nothing lower than you on the food chain?'