Plank Shredders Pillows

"Shred the plank."

Tuning Up for the Air Guitar Competition

"My career's in shreds, but on the bright side, so are my files."

New music conference

'Never trust emails. You can't shred them.'

The Affordable Shredder

"Apparently the Ebola virus can make your ears bleed."

Johnny Winter.

"You're in luck...I've unearthed those payroll records from 3 years ago."

Tortured Plank

'Look on it as... constructive criticism.'

Houdini's infancy.

'I don't know about you lot but I've just played Proud Mary.'

"I think he's going to be a bus driver - he loves cutting things up."

'We realise that your speciality is heavy metal...'

"Well, he was a lousy captain, but he sure knows how to go out in style!"

Recycle Station for Confidential Files

Musical Mestizo.

'Don't be a hero, Dewey! It's a snowboarder - and he's huge! Let's get out of here!!'

Plank

Rock on!

'The sooner you are 'discovered' the better - you're costing your Dad a fortune in electricity!'

'And all these years I just thought you were very proficient.'

'Cat Heaven.'

'I REALLY disapprove of our mandatory retirement plan!'

"Having trouble with that paper shredder again, Barry?"

'Yes, this is actually a very bad time to call me...'

Had it not been for Olympic sponsorship, Harold would have won the mens' downhill.

'HEY,nobody said anything about MOONwalking the Plank!!'