Pipe Predicament Analyst T-Shirts

"I'm sorry, sir, I can't inspect your water lines. I just read the meter."

Pipe Dream.

Why it's bad when home owners change their minds about the bathroom's location late in a building project.

Pipe Smoker of the Year Awards.

'Never underestimate the value of pipe-dreams, my son.'

Lazy plumber.

'Don't worry, the first 30 years of dealing with emergency plumbing problems are the hardest.'

'Certainly. Here's the break-down. Seventy-five dollars for my labour. And seventy-five dollars for you impersonating a plumber.'

Making it look easy.

Organ Player

Gardener digging and finding pipes.

'It's my own fault, I encouraged him to give up cigarettes in favour of a pipe. It was while we were on holiday in the Swiss Alps!'

'This is one of those 'shovel ready' jobs you hear about.'

Alpine Pipe

"This position may call for some occasional plumbing."

Pipe dreams!

'Why can't you just chew bones like other dogs?' (dog smoking pipe).

The two friends

Dog in front of fire, wearing slippers, reading paper, smoking pipe, with tea and bones. Owner says: 'Stay!'

A Passage in the Life of Mr. Watkins Tottle

'Your dinner met with the plumber's approval.'

Caricature of Stanley Baldwin, PM.

Lighting a Pipe

"Should I fix it or call it a water feature?"

Sherlock Holmes.

The Source of the Thames...

Master Plumber

Trophy head.

'It's Clegged up, Mrs - I'm afraid it means another U-turn!'

Compton MacKenzie.

Arthur Conan Doyle

Trilby -The Laird - 'It did one good to look at him'.