Pinterest Enthusiast Pillows

Pinterest shaming

'We have the same pinterest.'

"No Timmy, I don't think your pencil has system requirments or upgrades you can download from the internet."

Florida - Still Gay as F**k

'Yeah, I agree: It's hard to impress females by looking virile and strong when you're all pink...'

"I feel like I don’t even know my own husband ... and it’s driving me wild!"

'Sorry mate. Your church doesn't meet the minimum building code.'

Hamlet in the craft shop.

"Your membership entitles you to 15 books,45 posters,200 leaflets and umpteen stickers!"

Don't Take No For an Answer

Burning love

God save the Queen.

'I was going to leak this to wikileaks. Then I thought, why not write a 'tell all' book instead?'

Jewish Hall of Nachas

PRIDE!

Fine Print Letters

Notre Dame Phoenix

Man reading on top of giant pencil being carried by others.

"Getting a little thin on top and dull below, eh Pop?"

'Oi! '

Your DNA is in the database.

"When did tweeting become such an angry thing?"

"I'll pencil you in for recess."

That Pesky 'Why' Chromosome.

"But sir, you may think you want underwear, but your internet consumer profile says you want a jet ski."

"Do you know what your problem is, Duane? You're too full of yourself!"

'I don't know how it's being done - but someone's finding out our secrets...'

Monster Souvenir

A lumberjack leans against a giant pencil that reads "Giant Sequoia Brand No .2".

'It had been one of those long, smouldering, passionate kisses that seem to last forever'

Bank as a money tree

'V. K. Duvine and Prodigal Son (if he comes back)

Happy Valentine's Day

Small Business Loan of Pencils

FBI, 'Things are slow, Bensonhurst -- let's investigate the CIA.'