Piercing Ponderers Pillows

"Well, I've come this close to asking out Sylvia Sanchez. But I'm just an average guy! Nothing about me says 'I'm cool! Look at me!'"

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

"See this jelly wobbling. It was waving goodbye."

Vampire coming out of a body piercing shop with a stake in his heart

'There must be some way we can capitalize on that damn boson.'

'Of course I'm depressed. I've run out of places to pierce.'

'At first his nose ring irritated me, but then I made him tie a string to it. Now I can lead him around.'

'Do you ever wonder about this whole 'money' thing?'

"Well, son, in a way, I suppose Jesus was a trust-fund baby."

'You may choose either everlasting life or whatever is behind the curtain.'

'The mind-body problem is best expressed in the formulation...OOf!'

'Now don't complain Mum: You started it by giving me my first nose-ring...'

'I don't care if your friends all did it too - you look like an idiot!'

"I can take or leave my nose ring, but it does seem to improve wifi reception."

'The prisons are full, so I'm sentencing you to marry Rosie O'Donnell.'

"I have heard the mermaids singing, each to each. I told them to pipe down."

'Dad, I decided not to get a tattoo in the end. Like you, I got a piercing, instead.'

Hmmm... what's my real purpose? Why am I here? - 'Ooh! Ooh! Me! Me! Let me guess!' - 'Go on, then.' - 'Is your life a homage mediocrity?' - 'Ouch.' - 'Quizzes are fun! Ask me more!' -

"Ooooohhh, now that's what I call a piercing."

"Now that's a match made in heaven!"

"How about a self-inflating-a-flat-tire car?"

I Do Not have OCD

It was the Tube logo what gave me the idea

'Kids today!'

Check out our nose ring special for the bull market investor.

"Nice lip piercing."

"Yo've got to be more specific, Ed. Wake you when what's over?"

'The EHO said I had to remove all my rings, by the time I'm finished it's time to clock off!'

"Why cull us when we could be retrained?"

Dude, it's cool that you rebel by wearing a nose-ring, but if I were to do that, I would look just like my dad...

"Sorry mate - you're pierced."

'I've told you before: Don't let your tongue touch your nose-ring when it's very cold!'