Physical Recovery Pillows

'... but you've gotta admire him for at least trying to come back after an injury of that magnitude.'

"Okay, now breathe another sigh of relief."

'I really enjoyed my stay in the hospital - I never get served breakfast in bed at home.'

DO Not Disturb (Except For Meals)

Covid Inquiry / Enquiry

Spa

"Until the plaster sets, try not to laugh."

Social distancing

"I'm afraid we'll have to operate. Your appendix has an infection and it's extremely aggressive."

Be Healthy

"Actually, I'm still on life support. I just came by to do a feasibility study."

"We thought we would come somewhere remote to self-isolate."

"Let's consider an early dive."

'And when did you have your last owl movement?'

Vlad the Inhaler

Cardiac Recovery.

"Chaplain, the lord should put warning labels on some of his creations."

"May we live in interesting times. And may we outlive them."

Self-Isolating. Do Not Disturb (Except For Food).

I should probably get out more.

"I'll tell ya what we don't need is some Dr. Durango helping us with a dang snake bite."

"You'll have to help out here more. I pulled a hammy jumping over the moon."

'Believe me, Mr, Hart, Laughter really is the best medicine,'

'Okay, Mom. I'm sorry I re-gifted one of the kidneys you gave me.'

"He's going to be O.K., but he still wants you to remarry."

'Oh, believe me -- you don't want to hear it in layman's terms!'

"For most people, the sense of panic will be mild."

"No, nothing wrong. Just a great excuse for not 'noticing' some folks."

"It's from my first fight. So make the stitches big so I'll have a gnarly scar to show off."

If these are your medications, what happened to the beads I bought?

'Your master isn't due for release until the first of the month.'

Clown Cheering Up Patient.

"L.L. Bean slippers... $25.00 Ambulance ride to hospital... $500.00 X-rays of spine... $350.00 Three refills of hydrocodone... priceless!"

'He usually doesn't follow medical advice, but when the doctor told him to learn to relax...'