Personal Recovery Pillows

"With the help of Workaholics Anonymous, I was able to quit my job and take my life back."

"This lovely song tells of a young, pretty actress, her ups and downs, and how she found happiness after rehab."

'I really enjoyed my stay in the hospital - I never get served breakfast in bed at home.'

"Things are still a little rough for me, and occasionally I lose hope and get depressed—but I'm getting stronger every day."

Spa

"I'm afraid we'll have to operate. Your appendix has an infection and it's extremely aggressive."

"Actually, I'm still on life support. I just came by to do a feasibility study."

Vlad the Inhaler

'Believe me, Mr, Hart, Laughter really is the best medicine,'

Self-esteem room

'See? The idiots put my danged knee replacement in backward!'

'Okay, Mom. I'm sorry I re-gifted one of the kidneys you gave me.'

"He's going to be O.K., but he still wants you to remarry."

'Your master isn't due for release until the first of the month.'

Clown Cheering Up Patient.

"He should be up and complaining in no time."

'You seem rather ungrateful Mr. Jenkins. This new drug means you'll never have hayfever again.'

As a rule, all surprise parties start out with good intentions.

"Good news! She's asking for her Banana Republic and Williams-Sonoma catalogues."

Saline Drip Sommelier.

"Yeah, my life flashed before my eyes!...OK, it was food - all the food I've ever eaten flashed before my eyes."

"Friends have been scribbling on my cast."

"Remember, the road to recovery begins with baby steps."

"I can't stay in this hospital bed too long. Everyone will think I'm too old...too fragile...ready for the home. I'm not ready for that!"

"I'm sorry, Chuckles. We had to remove your funny bone."

"The doctor was more lucid today! That's a good sign!"

Scurile travels

'Your blood Sugar is very high.'

'Haven't seen you in church lately John?'

'Harvey does all his own 'get well' cards.'

"It says you need a CT scan and that the azaleas in the corner need to be watered twice daily."

"I've outlived my conventional and alternative doctors."

'The food here isn't too bad, just try not to swallow !'

'I'm sorry, Louis. I should have warned you that I installed a speed bump in front of the refrigerator.'

'Ignore them, Charlie. They're nothing but philistines. I liked your poetry, truly I did!'