Phone Signal Analysts Mugs

You didn't text me that you met a guy! I couldn�t. There was no cell phone coverage. How awful. Diner. I'll say. What good is love � If you can't brag about it? Wow. Is that Shakespeare?

"You know, there are other emojis."

"Somehow, they get exempted from a lot of laws."

"Thanks for considering me for the job as head of cybersecurity, but I already hacked into your network and gave myself the job."

"I meant the dog!"

"We're to stop talking about 'budget cuts'. Apparently it's depressing for staff and clients..."

'We just don't talk anymore, Gerald!'

Boss and worker communicating in exclaimation marks.

'He's not a 'bad' phone. He's just not a 'smart' phone.'

'He can toot his own horn but when he starts tooting the government's we need to step in.'

Vladimir Putin 101: Saying the Opposite of What You Mean

It's good news when an agent says "This is a big break" to an aspiring actor. But not good when said by an orthopedic surgeon holding your x-ray! It's jarring when your business partner says "We're going under while he's looking at the books. But it's very routine when said by a submarine captain speaking to the crew. "You're on fire" is nice to hear when you're playing an excellent round of golf. But not what you want to hear when you're grilling burgers. "A thumb on the scale" often mean

Soon The Moon Will Have Cellphone Reception Better Than That One Part Of Your Commute

'With my new phone I can lie out of both side of my mouth 24/7.'

No Hand Signals

"I'm not sure she really liked our gift. She used just two exclamation points after 'Thanks'."

"Try S instead of L."

'I'm really starting to worry about the AI-based system interface.'

"We don't call these savage screaming fits. We call them confrontational verbal interfacing."

"If I could take back ninety per cent of the things I say, then I think people would know the real me."

FYI, he's staring at your crotch again.

"It's a new signal to specify that we don't need Robin."

"Two bars—how about you?"

Remember, he's simple - It's not WHAT you bark at him, it's the TONE you use when you bark at him.

Ringing bell

"Ok, one finger means fastball, two fingers means curve, three fingers means changeup...and quite often I'll flash you the middle finger, because I've always hated your guts!"

"I just feel like it's important NOT to make good eye contact when communicating."

Donald Trump is a Plagiarist Too

"I would like to reaffirm that my problem is with the imperialists...not with their dollars."

'Well, this looks like the spot where your bandwidth is getting all clogged up.'

Family and dog, "I think Lassie is trying to tell us something Ma"

"If you ask me, the fire has the most potential, but it's the smoke that has people talking."

'After being on my site all day, it's nice to see some traffic.'

Man awoke by phone in a dream

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