Philosophy Nerd T-Shirts

'Rocco, are you listening?'

"What I like about intelligent design is that it explains everything will proving nothing."

Gottfried Wilhelm Leibniz

In/Out/These Things Happen.

Humans...What is their purpose?

Mr. Metamorphosis: "At least this better than waking up as a cockroach."

"You do realize I'm going to have to bill you for ten?"

Road sign: 'No Passing Zone... This, too, shall pass.'

"Je suis Descartes, donc, je pense."

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

Ahem. I'm eating. Not now, please. Just one tiny question. Believers I American exceptionalism have always said we're the paragon of democracy. So I'm just wondering … How come one party is passing unnecessary laws that'll keep millions of us from voting? They're robbing us of our voice! Could've surprised me.

'The Questioner'

Chiller Theatre

"Dad, please tell me again about that mass production and consumerism."

'Wow! -- Talk about a paradigm shift!'

A man deflates and dissolves into the ground and becomes a flower.

Pastorius wonders why.

'The meaning of life is dog food.'

"Hey, I'm just playing devil's avocado!"

"Ever feel like even when you're barking at something you're still barking at nothing?"

'WD-40 un-sticks things that should move and duct tape makes things that shouldn't move, stop.'

"Existentialist Trail. Get lost then found. Nietzsche Park System"

Zenemies.

'The recession is over, again.'

"Mrs. Marsha Mullhouse, of Kenosha, Wisconsin, asks, "Are You subject to the laws of physics, or are the laws of physics subject to You?"

"...I don't believe in the past or the future. I don't even believe in right now. Everyone remembers the past differently. Everyone imagines the future differently. Everyone even disagrees about what's happening right now. So who's to say tomorrow what you and I did tonight?"

"I never subscribed to Hobbes' state of nature theory until the night we left the kids without a sitter."

Arthur Schopenhauer

Admissions test for the Danbury Institute of Philosophy

'There is no past. No future. Only the present, which is changing every instant. Time is merely an illusion. Got it?'

"Is this who I am?"

"If the stars should appear one night in a thousand years, how would men believe and adore, and preserve for many generations the remembrance of the city of God which had been shown! … Emerson" "Good boy!"

'I'm an atheist!'

"I cross the road to forget."

How world war III started.