Philosophical Thinkers Gifts

It's never too late/It's never too early.

Ostrich with head in sand.

"I want to see it as art, but I keep asking myself 'is it really grocery?'"

"Those who ignore history are entitled to repeat it."

"What are we?"

"Happiness is more important than money,but it is easier to count money."

'The way I see it ... if the meek do inherit the earth, they're still going to need us.'

'It's not fair,' said Eve, 'even when I eat healthily I'm made to feel guilty.'

Roger Ebert as a kid 'I know God gave me a gift. I just don't know what it is yet.'

Concept Intolerant - soft, fluffy rocks only please.

A new "U" vending machine

'Actually the truth lies somewhere in between.'

Doctor Teflon & Mister Velcro

Brain

"A dark night of the soul? I had one of those once! OK, here's what you do: book passage on a Caribbean cruise, buy a new car and a couple gazillion-inch TVs. As I recall, that pretty much took care of mine!"

"If you never date a prediction it can't be proved wrong."

'This ride will really test your atheistic beliefs.'

"Do you ever wonder what happens to us when we die?"

'You're trying to find yourself? -- Shouldn't you let sleeping dogs lie?'

Do you know where the light goes when it goes out?

Bill was so careful not to be corrupted by success that he ended up being corrupted by failure.

"Discombobulating uncertainty is not the only kind of dithering, you know, Charles!"

Penny for your thoughts.

'I seem to be on the range but 'home' is proving illusive.'

If money talks, then how come silence is golden?

'Now they want to know what you've done for them SINCE the Big Bang.'

"I was involved in an awful accident, and was in a coma for three weeks. Half my life flashed before me!"

If there were no religion...s

'That was. . . well, incestuous. You were cloned from my rib.'

Remember the profound words of W.C. Fields. . .

'Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most. . .'

I had a dream last night that I was a fish. Believe me, you're not missing a thing.

"Man is the only animal I'm afraid of. A well fed lion has no ambitions."

'Four million years and an amphibian crammed ashore and developed into homosapiens so I see no point whatsover to go back!'

'I told you it would be like this!'