Philosopher Of Coexistence Pillows

Christian church steeple show jewish star in shadow

"Actually, I'm still on life support. I just came by to do a feasibility study."

"Call me?"

"Talking to your own reflection? Even your imagination is pathetic."

"Enjoy yourself while you can because before you know it, you've surpassed your 'Best Used By' date."

Man commiting suicide finds the treasure at the bottom of the sea.

"I sold my soul for about a tenth of what the damn things are going for now."

Can't even hold signs well.

Citizen of the world.

Bird in a chair with a human in a cage.

"Death coach..."

'Funny, I thought a near-death experience would be different, somehow.'

'Our relationship would be perfect if it wasn't for you!'

Stadium. No fans allowed. In baseball, "shutout" now has two meanings.

"How do I know God is not real? For the same reason I know people on TV can't see me."

" It was a jungle out there, but I quite liked it."

Apocalliptical

"I once experienced childlike wonder. . . but it was just my anti-depressants kicking in."

Quicksands of time

Yeah, I woke up as a roach because I was so full of existential dread – Why did you wake up as a dung beetle?

"I took the road less travelled just to avoid the potholes."

'And everybody expects me to be happy, which only makes things worse!'

"When you reach your expiration date, would you like to be crushed or recycled?"

Bartender: 'Bad day, huh?' Man: 'I'll say. My vindictive ex-wife just won sole custody of my inner child.'

"I've got pride but no shame."

'Isn't it about time to turn over a new leaf...?'

"What if you go under before I need to?"

"You know, Mother, they say dead is the new 80."

'I'm trying to become enlightened, but my stomach keeps growling and interrupting me!'

"I'm at the age where work is a lot less fun, and fun is a lot more work."

"Be patient! Weather and homeland are not chosen."

Seven males, ranging in age from a baby to an old man, wait in a line monitored by a uniformed guard.

'Ironically, before I fell on hard times, I was a professional wine taster.'

"Give a call when you get there."

"What a wonderful tune! I wonder who wrote the score?"