Philosopher In Pursuit Pillows

World peace...Guns 'R' Us

In/Out/These Things Happen.

Mr. Metamorphosis: "At least this better than waking up as a cockroach."

"Do you honestly believe we evolved from a single snow flake?"

Cats want answer to the big questions in life.

Chiller Theatre

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

'The world already ended, but the government hushed it up.'

'Oh for heaven's sake, you're a cow. Just eat grass and be happy.'

'If no man is an island, then what the hell is no woman?'

My God, I need to fart.

A man deflates and dissolves into the ground and becomes a flower.

'I think I just had an epiphany. How do I make it go away?'

'Contrary to the popular view, our studies show that it is real life that contributes to violence on television.'

Divine Desk Bins

"This may surprise some of your viewers, but I didn't actually want to go into the box."

'Agreed, 40 years is a long time to wander around, but think of the travel expenses.'

Admissions test for the Danbury Institute of Philosophy

Free speech isn't cheap!

Et in Arcadia Ego

'Oh dear! -- Well, look me up if you ever get reincarnated, okay?'

"Is this who I am?"

'Want to make it two out of three?'

"I cross the road to forget."

"Nihilistic customer service"

Non Thought For The Day.

'In my opinion, you're either part of the problem or part of the solution. Unless, of course, you're Jones, who thinks he can just float above it all!'

'Dad, what is peace?'

Fyodor Dostoyevsky

"If we evolved from stupid people, why are there stupid people still around?"

"Behold! I am God! I know all. Yet I'm constantly testing you even though I already know what you'll do. But I'll still punish you for the sins I planned for you to do. And you'll suffer in a fiery pit, tormented beyond imagining forever and ever and ever

"See what you get for thinking outside the fishbowl!"

"Your long-range investments would have made you a very wealthy man."

"Remember that '70s TV show 'What's Happening'!? Did they ever come up with an answer?" "I don't know, but it makes me wonder if Marvin Gaye found out what's going on." "The black hole of cannabis-induced queries"