Philanthropy Irony Pillows

"I won't be donating my tech billions to this school."

"HR-bill 9495. Cutting down non-profits."

"Gee, thanks pal."

"You can either make a pledge or join us in this weekend's Barkathon."

"I'm in nonprofit work for the money."

"Look at their faces! What did they expect? They never visited her! Of course the will says her money goes to the cat shelter. . ."

"I have special needs-- good food, warm bed, fresh water, and plenty of room to pop wheelies!"

'The best grants lie that-a-ways, Ma'am.'

"Mr.Scrooge has lodged a complaint,with regard to your 'aggressive begging."

Human Rights for All

"Thank you, and may the I.R.S. accept all your deductions."

"Tia Carmen, if times are tough, how come you're giving money away?"

Hypocrisy about poverty

Alms Bank

'In conclusion, I hope you all go out there, get well-paying jobs, and give lots of tax-deductible gifts to our alumni fund.'

"Originally I wanted to be a stockbroker but found I fainted at the sight of money.''

"You may think the government is a big 'Giveaway' program, but you can't deduct your tax as a charitable contribution."

Inflation Is Up, Interest Rates Are Going Up. . . I'm Asking You To UP Your Donation.

"My Aunt Agatha – feminist, civil rights activist, philanthropist, sound engineer for 'Cheap Trick at Budokan.'"

"I'll match donations when you match my tax payments."

This week is obscure charity awareness week.

"After spending thirty years creating models of early universe formation, I began to suspect that my work didn't make a shred of difference."

"Congratulations. Please remember the college's financial plight. Congratulations. Please remember the college's financial plight. Congratulations. Please remember . . ."

The nonprofit dog fight.

Beggar tosses money to the 1%.

"Do you want to ruin me?! Take it away!!"

'For donating half my property to the poor, I'll get the 'Unselfish Millionaire of the Year' medal and a supporting receipt for my allowable expenses!'

Illustration on the problem of money that is given to charities ending up in the hands of governments.

'Sorry - I only donate big.'

"My company sells military goods and information to unsavory characters around the world, and donates 100% of our profits to local charities!"

'Oooh, honey, will you get me that one?!'

"I got my first paycheck, and now I understand why our organization is classified as a nonprofit."

'I'd feel better spending all my money here if you were a registered charity.'

"You're correct, God doesn't need your tithe, but the church does."