Philanthropist Gifts

"When we said to be creative with your grant proposal presentation, this is not what was meant."

"Quick! I need some more charitable donations!"

'He is a persistant little fundraiser.'

"The university is delighted with the endowment but is there any flexibility over calling it the 'who's the rich one now you toffee nosed bastards' wing?"

'Can I choose which brick you name after me?'

'The best grants lie that-a-ways, Ma'am.'

"We did it, we found the nonprofit fountain of funding."

'You have what is known as 'gifting exhaustion'.'

"When times were good I trickled stuff down."

Honey badger do care.

'This isn't rocket science, Chuck. You donate $1,000 to a charity. You feel good. That's it.'

"I'm sorry, but this is a capital campaign."

"Did I just give, or did I give wisely? That is the question."

Man to biblical character: 'All this time we thought you were a non-prophet organization.'

'The problems with charities is that they are always needing donations.'

Corporate Head to others at meeting: 'Today is financial Arbor Day. We're going to find some worthwhile charity and plant a money tree.'

"Don't - they'll just spend it on drugs."

"It's Christmas, Melanie. Have young Cosgrove go down to the street and give something back to the community."

Gratitude

The nonprofit dog fight.

'Your very generous charitable contribution shows up as this very slight blip right here.'

The Warren Buffet Effect - Thank you For Not Asking How Much I Gave to Charity.

Corporate Head to others in meeting: 'I couldn't find a worthy recipient of my philanthropic giving, so I'm funneling it all through Grandma.'

"Greedy, meet needy."

"Yes, we're a charity tackling skyrocketing income inequality, but we're also a charity that should be saying 'I love my billionaire finder.'"

'What is the minimum contribution needed to be considered a philanthropist?'

'This was bestowed by a famous philanthropist before he made his fortune.'

"Now, before we actually help them, let's discuss our partnership and method of assisting."

Company discusses charity donations, boss says: 'We do want a personal touch, Bob, but I'm not sure homeless people need monogrammed socks.'

"A large portion of every meal is donated to charity."

'I'm tired of the Van Gough. Let's donate it to charity.'

'Help me out!"

'Shipwrecked or not I never miss sending out my annual contributions.'

"Is this donation to our community garden annual or perennial?"

"Look! It's the Montgomerys from the breast-cancer walk."